Yourself?

Stressed

I can't believe how stressed I am. Never ever before. I don't know if it's because I'm too packed, or all those repressed emotions finally catching up with me, or a new dorm room or what. But it's bad... It's bad it's bad it's baad.

My schedule. I give tuition on mon and thurs nights, salsa dance on wed, fri, sat, sun. Thinking of joining the weiqi club on tues nights. And on top of that I have to catch up with school lectures and read up before the practicals and tutorials. How I really wish I had more time!

It's like the opposite of NS. In NS you had to work regular hours, but after that, you had all the time in the world to blog and reflect.. But now, it seems like I don't even have time to blog, much less reflect.. And when I do, it's in such a rushed disjointed manner, and I can't even make conversation, so what I talk to people about is usually my feelings and stuff because I'm totally out of touch with the world!

I really wish I had one year to dream my dreams and do the necessary before going into medicine. Medicine is consuming my life.. And it doesn't help that 1st Professionals are in 4 mths time. I really want to grab my dreams while I still can. While I still have time. And if it'll kill me, I'll do it anyway. Just hope I've got friends who know what's really going on, and understand my crankiness at times, or utter silence. I'm really trying very hard, but I can't put in as much effort as people who are well rested and have caught up with their work.

Been annoyed also by little things, because I can feel that my body isn't managing the stress well.. It's starting to fall apart. My left ankle needs an ankle guard desperately cos everytime I dance and put my weight on it it hurts. And when I wake up in the mornings I limp around. My right hip too is screaming from the hip twists and stuff. The left ankle is dying because of the pirouettes that I'm supposed to master by March.

Had a really good time last weekend with the 3stans, kayaking and rollerblading, the girls really changed my opinion of women, because they learnt really fast, and were really strong types. I'm glad I saw that side of them. I think they saw the easterner side of me too. Quite sorry it was such a short thing, but I'm joining the canoe polo competition, so there's more chances of kayaking!

Dancing's going great, I'm making new friends among the dance scholars, and they're telling me about the differences between street jazz and ballet and lyrical jazz. Met Ivan from SP who's been working really hard to become a professional dancer, and he told me about the number of hours a day a professional has to put in to be really good. He's got a great dancer bod.. wish I'll get one someday. The ballet coach was a lawyer who decided to go into full time dance. He's stout but apparently very graceful... Built like a bodybuilder, dances like a bee.

Anyway, I'm glad that through all the tough times I've got a bunch of friends to tide me through.. Just dancing and meeting the dance people like porshee and salsa gang and the salsa fanatico people just takes the stress away. Drinking helps, though I'm trying to quit :P Geri's nice too, talking to me when I get online. Astee just visited me in my dorm yesterday and wrote me a really really nice birthday card that I'll keep for a loong time. Hope that no matter where she decides to study in the future we'll always be friends that will talk about anything and everything. Liyana amuses me and surprises me in school when we happen to meet, quite sorry that I haven't been smsing her or building a friendship much.. Maybe when the dust settles after the first week. 3stanis too, for being a bunch of people I can hang out and have fun with, tho I'm usually rushing around like a headless chicken in school, or zombified. Really grateful that I've got this bunch of friends to tide me through this adjustment period, and hopefully through the New Year!

Oh yes, the med people in dorm are also very nice for letting me join in their movie watching stuffs, even though I dont' know them really well yet. Christine, siva, pooja, david, evelyn, evelyn, qiantai, weiming, zihan, joachim. Glad we met before so we aren't strangers. And glad u guys are so helpful with my questions.

Yujing deserves a special mention for being the most active tagger! Haha JINGJINGJING! I haven't seen u in ages! MSN! E-mail!

Ok. Gotta go for PDP. More anatomy tomorrow with scary Prof Ling.

posted by Downhere. @ 12:59 pm